Thursday, April 11, 2013
I'm Not Hungry Anymore
I do not like to leave food on a plate. I will try to eat everything on my plate. Even when I am full I keep eating until all the food is gone if I can possibly help it. I know it's not healthy. I don't know why I do it. Maybe It's because I don't like to be wasteful. Maybe it's because I'm a bit O.C.D. (I even measure my shoe laces). Perhaps it's because that personality test I took in college said I was a perfestionist. But the fact remains that I do it. I'm just thankful that I have a fairly high metabolism rate. I could weigh 600 pounds now. (I could still stand to lose a few pounds). With that being said, I dare say I'm the same way in life. If you give me a task to do, I'm gonna do what it take to get it done. And if you give me 100 tasks, I will try to accomplish them, too. Maybe it's determination. It could be a will to prove I am somebody, I am not a loser. Possibly, it's a will to survive, or a need to feel wanted, accepted. But the fact remains that I will do it or die trying. Sometimes it feels a bit overwhelming. How will I ever get all of this or that done? I've tried ignoring the issue at hand, procrastination, if you will. It's still there. It doesn't go away. In fact, it only increases the stress level, particularly if there is a deadline involved. I don't care for asking for help. Maybe I'm afraid of looking weak, not up to the job. But life seems to favor those not-so-little curve balls. And it becomes necessary to make a change, albeit ever so uncomfortable to do so. I will either be forced to get assistance or back out altogether. But quitting is such an ugly option to me. The stresses of life have been mounting lately. My mind goes a thousand miles a minute most days. I watch the news and fret over things I have little to no control over, because I know it could potentially affect my life. Potentially? It shouldn't even be a concern yet, but it is one. Work has been changing drastically lately. I'm not convinced it's all for the good. But I work for the man, a rather large corporation that has been on the fortune 500 list. When they say jump you are more than welcome to ask questions, but in the end you'd be wise to just jump. But overall it's been a good job, and I feel compelled to be be thankful for it. Of course, there's this move coming up, as well. Anyone who has ever had to move knows the stresses of it all, whether it's across the street or across the world. Just the decision alone could nearly drive one mad. And I could never leave out family and friends. I must admit that some things have gotten a quick prayer and then forgotten. It's not because I don't care, but because I do. I could easily allow so many other problems consume me when I haven't even begun to conquer my own. But immediate family and close friends are not an option to ignore. I dare say I'd do just about anything for those close to me if I could. These days life is what it is. The stresses of life are great, and I'm positive I'm not alone when I wonder how I will ever get through it all. But I'm convinced it is not impossible. If I could give any advice on how to cope with a full plate, even to myself, it would be this: Start with one bite at a time, feel free to share, and don't be afraid to say no to dessert.